I have not secured one yet, and the man who is acting as such is so intemperate that I feel a fresh sense of escape with every day that passes without his mistaking the oxalic acid for Epsom salts, to the destruction of some earnest but constipated young patriot's whole digestive viscera.
"If you accept this position," continued the Surgeon, flinging away his refractory cigar in disgust, and rising to get a fresh one, "you will have the best rank and pay of any non-commissioned officer in the regiment; better, indeed, than that of a Second Lieutenant.

You will have your quarters here with me, and be compelled to associate with no one but me, thus reducing your disagreeable companions at a single stroke, to one.

And you will escape finally from all subserviency to Lieutenant Alspaugh, or indeed to any other officer in the regiment, except your humble servant.

As to food, you will mess with me." "Those are certainly very strong inducements," said Harry, meditating upon the delightfulness of relief from the myriad of rasping little annoyances which rendered every day of camp-life an infliction.
"Yes, and still farther, you will never need to go under fire, or expose yourself to danger of any kind, unless you choose to." Harry's face crimsoned to the hue of the western sky where the sun was just going down.

He started to answer hotly, but an understanding of the Surgeon's evident kindness and sincerity interposed to deter him.