They belonged to a not-unusual class of men whom it takes about as long to get thoroughly drunk as it does to heat up an iron-furnace, but the condition that they achieve then makes the intoxication of other and ordinary men seem a very mild and tame exhilaration.
By noon the next day this process was nearing its completion.

A messenger galloped into town with the information that the Union forces were coming, and would arrive in the course of an hour or two.
"Shash so ?" said Kent, straightening himself up with a crushing dignity that always formed a sure gauge of the extent to which inebriation had progressed.

"Shash so?
Troops 'she United States 'bout to enter shis lovely metropolis wish all pomp and shircumshtance 'reassherted 'thority.

'Shtonishin' event; wonderful 'casion.

Never happened 'fore; probably never'll happen again.