I did as I liked.

If I crooked my little finger, people ran after me and that one experience with her has broken me.

Oh, don't think,' he went on quickly, 'that I am broken in love.

I never loved her very much, it was just a passing passion, but she killed my self-confidence.

After then, whenever I came to a crucial moment in my affairs, when the big manner, the big certainty was absolutely necessary for me to carry my way, whenever I was most confident of myself and my ability and my scheme, a vision of this damned girl rose and I felt that momentary weakening, that memory of defeat, which made all the difference between success and failure.
"'I hated her and I hate her still,' he said with vehemence; 'if she dies I shall hate her more because she will remain everlastingly unbroken to menace my thoughts and spoil my schemes through all eternity.' "He leant forward, his elbows on his knees, his clenched fist under his chin--how well I can see him!--and stared at me.
"'I could have been king here in this land,' he said, waving his hand toward the interior, 'I could have bribed and shot my way to the throne of Albania.