Why am I going over it again, then?
Why am I hesitating?
As I came down the stairs yesterday, I said myself that it was base, loathsome, vile, vile...

the very thought of it made me feel sick and filled me with horror.
"No, I couldn't do it, I couldn't do it! Granted, granted that there is no flaw in all that reasoning, that all that I have concluded this last month is clear as day, true as arithmetic....

My God! Anyway I couldn't bring myself to it! I couldn't do it, I couldn't do it! Why, why then am I still... ?" He rose to his feet, looked round in wonder as though surprised at finding himself in this place, and went towards the bridge.

He was pale, his eyes glowed, he was exhausted in every limb, but he seemed suddenly to breathe more easily.

He felt he had cast off that fearful burden that had so long been weighing upon him, and all at once there was a sense of relief and peace in his soul.