CHAPTER XII.
I FORFEIT MY INDEPENDENCE.
"Be ye wise as serpents, and harmless as doves," was the advice of the Divine Lawgiver, when he sent his disciples forth on their heavenly mission to reform an evil world.
Religion, as I have before stated, had formed no part in my education.
I had read the sacred volume with fear and trembling, and derived no consolation from its mystic pages.

I had adopted the fatal idea, that I was one of those pre-condemned beings, for whom the blackness of darkness was reserved for ever, and that no effort on my part could avert the terrible decree.
This shocking and blasphemous belief had taken such deep hold of my mind, that looked upon all religious exercises as perfectly useless.

I could not fancy myself one of the elect, and so went from that extreme to the other.

If I were to be saved, I should be saved; if a vessel of wrath, only fitted for destruction, it was folly to struggle against fate, and I never suffered my mind to dwell upon the subject.

In the multitude of sorrows which pressed sorely on my young heart, I more than ever stood in need of the advice and consolation which the Christian religion can alone bestow.
I left the presence of my uncle, and sought my own chamber.