Then will come a stiff uncomfortable yoke for his neck, which he will call a collar, around which he will wind what he will call a necktie, the only useful purpose of which will be its value as a danger signal to the rest of mankind, for it will be through the medium of this addition to the human dress that character will manifest itself, man being prone unconsciously to show his strength or weaknesses in the manner of his personal adornment.

This will lead to all sorts of vain exhibitions until it will be with extreme difficulty that the public will be able to differentiate between a genuine peacock and an upstart jack-daw, masquerading in a merry widow hat.

Then will come the crowning misdemeanor in men's clothes which, for want of a better term let us call pants--a pair of bags sewed together at the top, and designed for no other purpose than to conceal from the world the character and quality of the wearer's legs.

When that beatific invention arrives your spindle-legged, knock-kneed imitation of a man will, as far as the public eye is concerned, find himself on as sure a footing as your very Adonis, and a person with a comparatively under-developed understanding will be able to make as good a showing in the world as the man who is really all there.

Like charity, these pants will cover a multitude of shins that once exposed to the world would at once give warning of the possessors' fundamental instability.