She envied Kate.

Kate could, as his sister, attach herself on to George's political career, and obtain from it all that excitement of life which Alice desired for herself.

Alice could not love her cousin and marry him; but she felt that if she could do so without impropriety she would like to stick close to him like another sister, to spend her money in aiding his career in Parliament as Kate would do, and trust herself and her career into the boat which he was to command.

She did not love her cousin; but she still believed in him,--with a faith which he certainly did not deserve.
As the two days passed over her, her mind grew more and more fixed as to its purpose.

She would tell Mr Grey that she was not fit to be his wife--and she would beg him to pardon her and to leave her.