[The Prelude to Adventure by Hugh Walpole]@TWC D-Link bookThe Prelude to Adventure CHAPTER XII 3/33
If he only knew of how much Craven was sure! Did he feel sure enough to speak to Margaret? Meanwhile the first and most obvious thing was that Bunning was in a state of terror that threatened instant exposure.
The man was evidently realizing that now, for the first time, he had a big thing with which he must grapple.
He must grapple with his devotion to Olva, with his terror of Craven, but, most of all, with his terror of himself.
That last was obviously the thing that tortured him, for, having now been given by the High Gods an opportunity of great service, so miserable a creature did he consider himself that he would not for an instant trust his control. He was trying, Olva saw, with an effort that in its intensity was pathetic to prove himself worthy of the chance that had been offered him, as though it were the one sole opportunity that he would ever be given, but to appear to the world something that he was not was an art that Bunning and his kind could never acquire--that is their tragedy. It was the fate of Bunning that his boots and spectacles should always negative any attempt that he might make at a striking personality. On the night after the "Rag" he sat in Olva's room and made a supreme effort at control. "If you can only hold on," Olva told him, "to the end of term.
It's only a week or two now.
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