I felt that, once gone, I could never return, and I must first have an explanation with John, and put an end to our engagement.

Yet how to seek him for such a purpose?
I had kept at so great a distance from him lately that it seemed impossible.

I felt that he would be relieved by my absence, and glad of his release, but my own woe pressed upon me.
I feared to make a fool of myself, if he was kind as of old when we said good-bye.
So I was dancing with the rest, and Captain Tyrrell was my partner.

We were very merry.

Grace was playing for us, and looked approvingly over her shoulders.