"Why cannot we wait till spring ?" There was a kind of tremble in her voice as she spoke, for she felt a strange mixture of desire and reluctance for this journey.

On one hand, she wished to reach Europe quickly, because Percy was there, and because even if they never met again, she believed she should be able to hear of him, and to satisfy herself that he still thought of her.

On the other, she was really a little afraid of the winter voyage.

She had never even seen the sea, and had a kind of mysterious awe of it.
Stronger, however, than any selfish feeling was a keen anxiety which had taken possession of her with regard to her mother's health, the feebleness of which became daily more apparent; so that her double wishes neutralized each other, and she could scarcely tell whether if the decision rested with her, it would have been to stay or to go.
But she wanted to hear her mother's reasons, so she asked-- "Why cannot we wait till spring ?" Mrs.Costello again paused before answering.

She, like Lucia, had more thoughts on the subject than she was willing to express; but she had one powerful reason for losing no time, which she decided that Lucia ought to know.
"Because I am anxious to see my cousin, who is almost our only relation, and to introduce you to him." "But why, mamma?
As we cannot go to England what good will it do us just to see him for a moment ?" "I cannot go to England, but there is nothing to prevent you from doing so." "Oh, dear, that old idea still! It is quite useless, mamma.