You have suffered enough, if you have not acted as I should have expected you to act.

I blame myself unutterably, and I hope I see my way to such a comfortable and respectable start in life for you that these three years in that vile place may not be to your permanent disadvantage." I was just opening my lips to thank him, when he got up and went to his tall desk, where he took a pinch of snuff, and then added as he turned away, "Thank GOD I have _one_ son who is frank with his father!" My lips were sealed in an instant.

This, then, was my reward for that hard journey of escape, with Jem on my back, which had only saved him; for having stifled envy in gladness for his sake, when (in those bits of our different holidays which overlapped each other) I saw and felt the contrast between our opportunities; for having suffered my harder lot in silence that my mother might not fret, when I felt certain that my father would not interfere! My heart beat as if it would have pumped the tears into my eyes by main force, but I kept them back, and said steadily enough, "Is that all, sir ?" My father did not look up, but he nodded his head and said, "Yes; you may go." As I went he called me back.
"Are you going to the farm this afternoon ?" To my own infinite annoyance I blushed as I answered, "I was going to sit with Charlie a bit, unless you have any objection." "Not at all.

I only asked for information.

I have no wish to interfere with any respectable friends you may be disposed to give your confidence to.