I abhorred the play, the making of a nightly spectacle of myself, the rudeness and freedom of the audiences, the coarse, common-place people with whom I was constantly compelled to consort.

You know them, and can therefore realize to some extent what daily association with them must necessarily mean to one of my early training and familiarity with quieter social customs.

But my position in the troupe afforded me certain privileges of isolation, while my necessities compelled me to persevere.

As a result, the dormant art-spirit within apparently came to life; ambition began to usurp the place of indifference; I became more and more disgusted with mediocrity, and began an earnest struggle toward higher achievements.
I had little to guide me other than my own natural instincts, yet I persevered.

I insisted on living my own life while off the stage, and, to kill unhappy thought, I devoted all my spare moments to hard study.
Almost to my surprise, the very effort brought with it happiness.