I labeled the bottle "The Amsterdam Cleansing Compound"; and I wrapped round it the following note: "Mr.Pickup's respectful compliments to Mr .-- (let us say, Green).

Is rejoiced to state that he finds himself unexpectedly able to forward Mr.
Green's views relative to the cleaning of 'The Burgomaster's Breakfast.' The inclosed compound has just reached him from Amsterdam.

It is made from a recipe found among the papers of Rembrandt himself--has been used with the most astonishing results on the Master's pictures in every gallery of Holland, and is now being applied to the surface of the largest Rembrandt in Mr.P.'s own collection.

Directions for use: Lay the picture flat, pour the whole contents of the bottle over it gently, so as to flood the entire surface; leave the liquid on the surface for six hours, then wipe it off briskly with a soft cloth of as large a size as can be conveniently used.

The effect will be the most wonderful removal of all dirt, and a complete and brilliant metamorphosis of the present dingy surface of the picture." I left this note and the bottle myself at two o'clock that day; then went home, and confidently awaited the result.
The next morning our friend from the office called, announcing himself by a burst of laughter outside the door.