[Mr. Sponge’s Sporting Tour by R. S. Surtees]@TWC D-Link book
Mr. Sponge’s Sporting Tour

CHAPTER XLII
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He lay a long time tossing, and proing and coning, without being able to arrive at any satisfactory solution of the matter.

At last he rang his bell, and finding it was eight o'clock he got up, and proceeded to dress himself; which operation being accomplished, he sought Jack's room, to have a little confidential conversation with him on the subject, and arrange about paying Sponge for the horse, without letting out who was the purchaser.
Jack was snoring, with his great mouth wide open, and his grizzly head enveloped in a white cotton nightcap.

The noise of Pacey entering awoke him.
'Well, old boy' growled he, turning over as soon as he saw who it was, 'what are you up to ?' 'Oh, nothing particular,' replied Mr.Pacey, in a careless sort of tone.
'Then make yourself scarce, or I'll baptize you in a way you won't like,' growled Jack, diving under the bedclothes.
'Oh, why I just wanted to have--have half a dozen words with you about our last night's' (ha--hem--haw!) 'handicap, you know--about the horse, you know.' 'About the w-h-a-w-t ?' drawled Jack, as if perfectly ignorant of what Pacey was talking about.
'About the horse, you know--about Mr.Sponge's horse, you know--that you got me to challenge for you, you know,' stammered Pacey.
'Oh, dash it, the chap's drunk,' growled Jack aloud to himself, adding to Pacey, 'you shouldn't get up so soon, man--sleep the drink off.' Pacey stood nonplussed.
'Don't you remember, Mr.Spraggon,' at last asked he, after watching the tassel of Jack's cap peeping above the bedclothes, 'what took place last night, you know?
You asked me to get you Mr.Sponge's chestnut, and you know I did, you know.' 'Hout, lad, disperse!--get out of this!' exclaimed Jack, starting his great red face above the bedclothes and squinting frightfully at Pacey.
'Well, my dear friend, but you did,' observed Pacey soothingly.
'Nonsense!' roared Jack, again ducking under.
Pacey stood agape.
'Come!' exclaimed Jack, again starting up, 'cut your stick!--be off!--make yourself scarce!--give your rags a gallop, in short!--don't be after disturbin' a gen'leman of fortin's rest in this way.' 'But, my dear Mr.Spraggon,' resumed Pacey, in the same gentle tone, 'you surely forget what you asked me to do.' '_I do_,' replied Jack firmly.
'Well, but, my dear Mr.Spraggon, if you'll have the kindness to recollect--to consider--to reflect on what passed, you'll surely remember commissioning me to challenge Mr.Sponge's horse for you ?' '_Me!_' exclaimed Jack, bouncing up in bed, and sitting squinting furiously.

'_Me!_' repeated he; '_un_possible.

How could _I_ do such a thing?
Why, I handicap'd him, man, for you, man ?' 'You told me, for all that,' replied Mr.Pacey, with a jerk of the head.
'Oh, by Jove!' exclaimed Jack, taking his cap by the tassel, and twisting it off his head,' that won't do!--downright impeachment of one's integrity.
Oh, by Jingo! that won't do!' motioning as if he was going to bounce out of bed;' can't stand that--impeach one's integrity, you know, better take one's life, you know.


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