"My father," he said to me, "once spoke to me rather sharply about not attending at family prayers.

He did not attend very closely himself.
I was an observant boy, and I knew it.

The very fact that he should have noticed me proved it.

So all I felt was that prayer didn't matter really, but that, however I felt, I must behave as if I was devout; whereas, if he had prayed in rapt fervency, unconscious of anything, I should have been ashamed, I think, to wander.

I should have perceived the beauty of prayer.