Even Edward, fond as he was of me, seemed to have no real connection with me.

I was isolated and despairing.

But very gradually, like the dispersing of a cloud, it came back.

I began again to feel myself a performer in the drama, not a gloomy spectator of it--there must be the sufferer, the condemned, to make the tragedy complete, and they may be enacted well--till the sense of God's Fatherhood came back to me.

So that I can be and feel myself a part of the vast economy, diseased and inefficient though I am--feel that I am one with the life that throbs in the trees and water, and that forces itself up at every cranny and nestles in every ledge--can wait patiently for my move, the transference of my vital energy--as strong as ever, it seems to me, though the engines are weaker--to some other portion of the frame of things." He spoke of spiritualism with great contempt.