I had joyed in the pleasures of the table, and I had written copiously of those joys, and I now declined to recant of my faith or to abate my indulgences.
All this talk which I had heard about balanced rations went in at one ear and out at the other.

I knew what a balanced ration was.

I stowed one aboard three times daily--at morn, again at noon and once more at nightfall.

A balanced ration was one which, being eaten, did not pull you over on your face; one which you could poise properly if only you leaned well back, upon arising from the table, and placed the two hands, with a gentle lifting motion, just under the overhang of the main cargo hold.
Surely there must be some way of achieving the desired result other than by following dieting devices.

There was--exercising was the answer.