I should shut it up in my mind.

Yes, that's what I'm afraid of.

Going about with something in my mind all my life that never changes.

I find it so difficult to change.

When I think a thing's wrong I never stop thinking it wrong, and Ralph was quite right, I see, when he said that there's no such thing as right and wrong; no such thing, I mean, as judging people--" "Ralph Denham said that ?" said Katharine, with considerable indignation.
In order to have produced such suffering in Mary, it seemed to her that he must have behaved with extreme callousness.