The strain was too great.

I sometimes thought my mind would give way under it--a meet thing on this ship of madmen and brutes.

Every hour, every minute of my existence was in jeopardy.

I was a human soul in distress, and yet no soul, fore or aft, betrayed sufficient sympathy to come to my aid.

At times I thought of throwing myself on the mercy of Wolf Larsen, but the vision of the mocking devil in his eyes that questioned life and sneered at it would come strong upon me and compel me to refrain.