[Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens]@TWC D-Link book
Oliver Twist

CHAPTER IV
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His step was elastic, and his face betokened inward pleasantry, as he advanced to Mr.Bumble, and shook him cordially by the hand.
'I have taken the measure of the two women that died last night, Mr.
Bumble,' said the undertaker.
'You'll make your fortune, Mr.Sowerberry,' said the beadle, as he thrust his thumb and forefinger into the proffered snuff-box of the undertaker: which was an ingenious little model of a patent coffin.

'I say you'll make your fortune, Mr.Sowerberry,' repeated Mr.Bumble, tapping the undertaker on the shoulder, in a friendly manner, with his cane.
'Think so ?' said the undertaker in a tone which half admitted and half disputed the probability of the event.

'The prices allowed by the board are very small, Mr.Bumble.' 'So are the coffins,' replied the beadle: with precisely as near an approach to a laugh as a great official ought to indulge in.
Mr.Sowerberry was much tickled at this: as of course he ought to be; and laughed a long time without cessation.

'Well, well, Mr.Bumble,' he said at length, 'there's no denying that, since the new system of feeding has come in, the coffins are something narrower and more shallow than they used to be; but we must have some profit, Mr.Bumble.
Well-seasoned timber is an expensive article, sir; and all the iron handles come, by canal, from Birmingham.' 'Well, well,' said Mr.Bumble, 'every trade has its drawbacks.

A fair profit is, of course, allowable.' 'Of course, of course,' replied the undertaker; 'and if I don't get a profit upon this or that particular article, why, I make it up in the long-run, you see--he! he! he!' 'Just so,' said Mr.Bumble.
'Though I must say,' continued the undertaker, resuming the current of observations which the beadle had interrupted: 'though I must say, Mr.
Bumble, that I have to contend against one very great disadvantage: which is, that all the stout people go off the quickest.


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