I get somewhere about two hundred a year for fencing the _deil_, and I'm afraid I don't do it half so effectually as you've done.'" "Whilst I am writing, another of the many stories of the learned and facetious professor rises in my mind.

There was a worthy old woman at Cults whose place in church was what is commonly called the Lateran; a kind of small gallery at the top of the pulpit steps.

She was a most regular attender, but as regularly fell asleep during sermon, of which fault the preacher had sometimes audible intimation.

It was observed, however, that though Janet always slept during her own pastor's discourse, she could be attentive enough when she pleased, and especially was she alert when some young preacher occupied the pulpit.

A little piqued, perhaps, at this, Mr.Gillespie said to her one day, 'Janet, I think you hardly behave very respectfully to your own minister in one respect.' 'Me, sir!' exclaimed Janet, 'I wad like to see ony man, no tae say woman, by yoursell, say that o' me! what can you mean, sir ?' 'Weel, Janet, ye ken when I preach you're almost always fast asleep before I've well given out my text; but when any of these young men from St.Andrews preach for me, I see you never sleep a wink.