I used to have mair colds before I took to wearing kilts than ever I've had since I made a practice of gie'in up my troosers.

And there's a freedom aboot a kilt that troosers canna gie ye.
I've made many friends in America, but I'm afraid I've made some enemies, too.

For there's a curious trait I've found some Americans have.

They've an audacity, when they're the wrang sort, I've never seen equalled in any other land.

And they're clever, tae--oh, aye-- they're as clever as can be! More folk tried tae sell me things I didna want on that first tour o' mine.