Now I am astonished to think that I did not see my real situation.

It was so easy to perceive it, in view of those quarrels, begun for reasons so trivial that afterwards one could not recall them.
"Just as it often happens among gay young people that, in the absence of jokes, they laugh at their own laughter, so we found no reasons for our hatred, and we hated each other because hatred was naturally boiling up in us.

More extraordinary still was the absence of causes for reconciliation.
"Sometimes words, explanations, or even tears, but sometimes, I remember, after insulting words, there tacitly followed embraces and declarations.

Abomination! Why is it that I did not then perceive this baseness ?".