In his heart there may have existed a grudge against the Almighty for placing him in a position which was not only intensely disagreeable, but also somewhat ridiculous.
For he did not dare to tell his friends of these things.

He had spoken of them to no man except Karl Steinmetz, who was in a sense his dependent.

English public school and university had instilled into him the intensely British feeling of shame respecting good works.

He could take chaff as well as any man, for he was grave by habit, and a grave man receives the most chaff most good-humoredly.

But he had a nervous dread of being found out.