I was about to deny myself, when Mark Twain said: "Give it to me, I'll fix it," and left the table.
Presently he came to the door and beckoned me out.
"I represented myself as your secretary and told this man," said he, "that you were not here, but that if Mr.Halstead would answer just as well I would fetch him.

The fellow is as innocent as a lamb and doesn't know either of you.

I am going to introduce you as Halstead and we'll have some fun." No sooner said than done.

The reporter proved to be a little bald-headed cherub newly arrived from the isle of dreams, and I lined out to him a column or more of very hot stuff, reversing Halstead in every opinion.
I declared him in favor of paying the national debt in greenbacks.
Touching the sectional question, which was then the burning issue of the time, I made the mock Halstead say: "The 'bloody shirt' is only a kind of Pickwickian battle cry.

It is convenient during political campaigns and on election day.