These are the reflections of the first days; but when the lapse of time proves the reality of the evil, then the actual bitterness of grief commences.

Yet from whom has not that rude hand rent away some dear connection?
And why should I describe a sorrow which all have felt, and must feel?
The time at length arrives when grief is rather an indulgence than a necessity; and the smile that plays upon the lips, although it may be deemed a sacrilege, is not banished.

My mother was dead, but we had still duties which we ought to perform; we must continue our course with the rest and learn to think ourselves fortunate whilst one remains whom the spoiler has not seized.
My departure for Ingolstadt, which had been deferred by these events, was now again determined upon.

I obtained from my father a respite of some weeks.

It appeared to me sacrilege so soon to leave the repose, akin to death, of the house of mourning and to rush into the thick of life.