But-- Well, as soon as I got out in the company of others I was driven to melancholy and spiritual tears.

I could neither laugh with nor at the solemn utterances of men I esteemed ponderous asses; nor could I laugh, nor engage in my old-time lightsome persiflage, with the silly superficial chatterings of women, who, underneath all their silliness and softness, were as primitive, direct, and deadly in their pursuit of biological destiny as the monkeys women were before they shed their furry coats and replaced them with the furs of other animals.
And I was not pessimistic.

I swear I was not pessimistic.

I was merely bored.

I had seen the same show too often, listened too often to the same songs and the same jokes.