Yet she could never stop up the terrible gap of insufficiency.
If only Birkin would form a close and abiding connection with her, she would be safe during this fretful voyage of life.

He could make her sound and triumphant, triumphant over the very angels of heaven.

If only he would do it! But she was tortured with fear, with misgiving.
She made herself beautiful, she strove so hard to come to that degree of beauty and advantage, when he should be convinced.

But always there was a deficiency.
He was perverse too.

He fought her off, he always fought her off.