My personal compassion, my love for my companions in ignorance and suffering bears no fruit, benefits no one, and it frequently seems to me that, if the truth were known, I am an egoist of the deepest dye.
"If I could at least act consistently with the philosophy which directs nay views of life! But I am not even capable of that.

Systematically, I concede no importance to outward forms.

Maja does not count me among her devotees.

What are houses?
What are the phantoms who inhabit them?
A transient semblance, a delusion of the senses! And yet, I am conscious that I miss just those houses which happen to stand, in Berlin and that I feel an unspeakable longing for the phantom called Dr.Schrotter.Once again it has been proved to me that I am an unconscious plaything in the hands of unknown powers, for again, as more than once in my life, and always at decisive moments, some outside agency has interfered in my fate, and disposed of me contrary to my own intentions, by sending me out of Berlin and away from you.

But, nevertheless, my appreciation of this fact does not give me the strength to accept the inevitable in silence and without repining.
"Enough--I will not pain you.