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THE SEARCH FOR HEALING.
Yet I was unwilling to yield.
Before taking life on its pleasant side--a side which to me seemed rather sinister--I resolved to test everything.

I remained thus for some time, a prey to countless sorrows, tormented by terrible dreams.
The great obstacle to my cure was my youth.

Wherever I happened to be, whatever my occupation, I could think of nothing but women; the sight of a woman made me tremble.
It had been my fate--a fate as rare as happy--to give to love my unsullied youth.

But the result of this was that all my senses united in idealizing love; there was the cause of my unhappiness.