I wish there was something I could do but there doesn't seem to be anything.

Mother and Nan and Di are busy all the time and I just wander about like a lonely ghost.

What hurts me terribly, though, is that mother's smiles, and Nan's, just seem put on from the outside.

Mother's eyes never laugh now.

It makes me feel that I shouldn't laugh either--that it's wicked to feel laughy.