[Antonina by Wilkie Collins]@TWC D-Link bookAntonina CHAPTER 20 13/17
Here, therefore, she took refuge, crouching in the darkest corner of the building, and hiding her face in her hands, as if to shut out all view of the dreary though altered scenes which spread before her eyes. Woeful thoughts and recollections now moved within her in bewildering confusion.
All that she had suffered since Ulpius had dragged her from the farm-house in the suburbs--the night pilgrimage over the plain--the fearful passage through the wall--revived in her memory, mingled with vague ideas, now for the first time aroused, of the plague and famine that were desolating the city; and, with sudden apprehensions that Goisvintha might still be following her, knife in hand, through the lonely streets; while passively prominent over all these varying sources of anguish and dread, the scene of the young chieftain's death lay like a cold weight on her heavy heart.
The damp turf of his grave seemed still to press against her breast; his last kiss yet trembled on her lips; she knew, though she dared not look down on them, that the spots of his blood yet stained her garments. Whether she strove to rise and continue her flight; whether she crouched down again under the portico, resigned for one bitter moment to perish by the knife of Goisvintha--if Goisvintha were near; to fall once more into the hands of Ulpius--if Ulpius were tracking her to her retreat,--the crushing sense that she was utterly bereaved of her beloved protector--that the friend of her brief days of happiness was lost to her for ever--that Hermanric, who had preserved her from death, had been murdered in his youth and his strength by her side, never deserted her.
Since the assassination in the farm-house, she was now for the first time alone; and now for the first time she felt the full severity of her affliction, and knew how dark was the blank which was spread before every aspiration of her future life. Enduring, almost eternal, as the burden of her desolation seemed now to have become, it was yet to be removed, ere long, by feelings of a tenderer mournfulness and a more resigned woe.
The innate and innocent fortitude of disposition, which had made her patient under the rigour of her youthful education, and hopeful under the trials that assailed her on her banishment from her father's house; which had never deserted her until the awful scenes of the past night of assassination and death rose in triumphant horror before her eyes; and which, even then, had been suspended but not destroyed--was now destined to regain its healing influence over her heart.
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