He must have been two years old the day you were born.
Genius is cert'nly a wonderful phenomenus!' "I set there a minute, wilted, but nervous.

Then I got hot, and arose in anger.
"'My son!' I says, scornful.

'So that's what he says, it is?
Disgracing his father in that way! All right for him! I disown him out of my family.

And I furthermore remark that he ain't my son, nor never was.' "'Well,' she says, 'you needn't get so hot about it.

He's a hard worker.
He's been here all day.' "'I ain't hot,' I says, forgetting that my temperature was torrid plus glowing, 'but I'm mad to think that that boy which I hired to sell my book should pass himself off as my son, and then stay talking all day in one place, instead of selling books throughout the promiscuous neighborhood.' "'Then,' she says, as if for the first time seeing light, 'that young man in their ain't no son of the author of this "Sin" book ?' "'Never; subsequent nor previous, nor wasn't, nor will be,' I solemnly made prevarication.
"'Well,' she says, 'he said he was when he come in; and me and ma didn't think it likely an author person would have his son out book-peddling, so we asservated back that he wasn't; and him and ma has been having a high-grade talking match all day in the front parlor to convince each other otherwise than what they are convinced of.' "'Him,' continued the lovely girl, 'says he'll sell ma a book BECAUSE he's the son of the author thereof, and ma says she'll buy a book if he owns up truthful that he ain't the son of the author thereof.