Think of that--what little things change the world's history--yes, sir, the place had been filled.

Well, there I was, you see.

I offered to compromise and go to Paris.

The President was very sorry and all that, but that place, you see, didn't belong to the West, so there I was again.
There was no help for it, so I had to stoop a little--we all reach the day some time or other when we've got to do that, Washington, and it's not a bad thing for us, either, take it by and large and all around -- I had to stoop a little and offer to take Constantinople.

Washington, consider this--for it's perfectly true--within a month I asked for China; within another month I begged for Japan; one year later I was away down, down, down, supplicating with tears and anguish for the bottom office in the gift of the government of the United States--Flint-Picker in the cellars of the War Department.