It was well I had not time to dwell on it, or I might have reached some spiritually-disturbing melancholy.
Let me say here that ever since I had received my Lady's message concerning this visit to St.Sava's I had been all on fire--not, perhaps, at every moment consciously or actually so, but always, as it were, prepared to break out into flame.

Did I want a simile, I might compare myself to a well-banked furnace, whose present function it is to contain heat rather than to create it; whose crust can at any moment be broken by a force external to itself, and burst into raging, all-compelling heat.
No thought of fear really entered my mind.

Every other emotion there was, coming and going as occasion excited or lulled, but not fear.

Well I knew in the depths of my heart the purpose which that secret quest was to serve.

I knew not only from my Lady's words, but from the teachings of my own senses and experiences, that some dreadful ordeal must take place before happiness of any kind could be won.